Move on Through….

Last night I asked people whether they, or someone they knew, had experienced a traumatic loss. The response was overwhelming. I have yet to reply to all who took the time and trusted me to share their stories both privately and publicly. I want to thank you and acknowledge both your experience and the loved […]

Into the Blue…

This week I am on a family break. Our cottage looks out onto a long stretch of sand, nestled in a pretty bay. When I come to this place, I can literally feel my body take a breath of relief. It is as if coming here gives me permission to relax properly. It has so […]

Be Your Own Best Friend…

Yesterday morning my car wouldn’t start. It was 7am and this set off a frustrating chain of events and phone-calls, only to discover my breakdown cover had also expired. I felt stressed and overwhelmed. I immediately started giving myself a hard time for perhaps leaving a light on in the car overnight, letting my breakdown […]

“Its complicated…”

Grief is a complex concept, both emotionally and academically. But when psychologists talk about complex or complicated grief, what they mean is that the expected emotional process following a loved one’s death, that we have labelled as grief, goes on for a period that is considered longer than normal. Usually, this is taken as 6 […]

The hard work of guilt and shame…

When you are studying for an undergraduate degree in psychology, you explore emotions in depth. Guilt and shame are two I remember most prominently from my undergraduate days, having written an assignment on them. These emotions come up time and again in treatment sessions. Like all emotions, you will have experienced them at one time […]

Anniversary Peaceful

Today marks the two-year anniversary of my husband’s death. In the last few days, friends and colleagues who knew the day was coming around again, have reached out to offer some support. It’s comforting to know that people remember him and are speaking his name. I want him to be remembered. I recently spoke with […]

Vulnerability and Strength

Doing the job I do, means people meet me at their most vulnerable. Usually, clients will have taken time and often significant effort to consider seeking psychological therapy. It might have involved difficult conversations with family members or friends and perhaps even more difficult conversations with themselves. It might also have involved previous attempts at […]

Choose Happiness…

When future generations look back, they will likely view this period in time as one of immense challenge. 2020 has brought us a global pandemic, race riots and death and suffering on an incomprehensible scale. There is no one untouched by Covid-19. We are, all of us, subject to the daily demands of lockdown, shielding, […]

Lets end the silence…

I’ve thought about whether to write this, since I watched in horror as George Floyd took his last breath. Initially, the reason why I didn’t write, was because I believed I shouldn’t have a voice here. I am white. I am privileged. It felt uncomfortable. ‘It’s not my place’, I told myself. I was also […]

Buried Under Sand or Grass…

This morning I lay awake in the quiet, anticipating which one of my children would come to greet me first. It was 6am. It’s rarely silent in my house. Eventually, one of my nearly four-year old twin boys, popped his head through the bedroom door and smiled at me. He padded sleepily round to my […]